There are values that help relationships last and grow;
things like love, respect, and trust.
However, in order for individuals to be able to be express these
qualities in a relationship, a person must possess these values. Where do people acquire these core
values? Personally, I grew up in a
family that lacked in these core values. Needless to say, the relationship was
not very healthy, loving, or trusting.
My family didn’t go to church or have special prayer time. We didn’t have family gatherings or
communicate very well. I had to learn
these things on my own and have found that most successful relationships are
developed through fellowship in church.
In college, I was luckily introduced to a college bible
study group called Shepard’s Church, which held regular bible study sessions and
revival. The meetings were held in a large
garage in the back of the pastor’s home.
The pastor’s wife played the piano and led us in religious song. We started each one of our meetings with a
meal. Each member took turns preparing the meal. The pastor was kind enough to reimbursed
us for the cost of buying the food from his donations. Each week we were assigned a few select
verses in the bible to study, meditate, and pray on. People who chose to share what the verses
meant were welcome to explain their interpretation in front of the
congregation. After the speeches were
presented, we ended our meetings in prayer.
I learned a lot from studying the bible during those
meetings. Many lessons were based on how
to treat our fellow man by “loving thy neighbor as yourself” (Mark 12:31) The
way people treat each other should be based on love and respect, but often
times, for whatever reason people hold resentments and unforgiveness towards
people. This type of unforgiveness can
turn into bitterness, hatred, and rage.
If left unaddressed, many relationships become unhealthy and toxic;
often times resulting in physical and or emotion abuse. We have all heard of the stories on the news
of people hurting each other in an abusive relationship. There are many dynamics involved and some can
be resolved easily if the main foundations were instilled in the Individual.
The bible also mentions how a man is to love his wife and
how a wife is to love her husband. Ephesians
5:8 states, “Husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the church.” Ephesians 5:22 states that “wives, submit to
your husbands as to the Lord.” These biblical
lessons teach people how to act and have a loving, Christian based
relationship. I have seen though
Shepard’s Church Meetings, over time, many of the congregation members fell in
love and got married. I am a witness
that the biblically based marriage works because these individuals are still
married and still attend church faithfully studying God’s Word together.
I have been on a personal quest for most of my life to have
some type of closure and resolution to the failing relationships and my
life. Through the Church and Education I
have found some techniques that can increase the chances of a marriage lasting. I would like to continue my education at the
University of Redlands MA Program to help as many individuals I can find the
help they need in their relationships.
